This is my second task, that given by Miss Widya as a writing task, and I would like to tell you about my newest experience that little bit horrible to tell hihi 😆😆
Hope you like it❤
It was terrible day, exactly on Friday afternoon lastweek. I went to the Radio Station to work as usual at 4pm. It had been very hot at noon, before suddenly the dark clouds came. I went home from campus at 3pm and left home at 3.45pm so, I was in a hurry. My mother told me to bring the raincoat, but I had an optimistic feelings that it wouldn't be rain before I got there. I didn't check my stuffs and just went there in high speed. But my mom's prediction trully happened.
When i got in intersection in front of the Artos Mall, suddenly i felt the water dropped in my hand, and in a half minute, a huge heavy rain came with extra loudly thunder 😢. I had no choice to stop because i was in the middle of the crowded vehicles near the trafficlamp. I didn't bring the raincoat, so my body got wet directly. My suffer not only ended at that point. Suddenly, my motorcycle was off. I tried to pushed the start button but it didn't work. I was really embarrassed because my position still there. Many people were staring strange at me and i didn't know what to do. I was alone and 5minutes left to onair 😢.
I decided to walk and take my motorcycle beside me. Noone helped me. I did it all by myself. I felt like i had been taking a shower in the road before i went work. My suffer continued, i was walking along the road when there was a car moved in high speed and made a high-jumped of water to me. Whoaaaa what a complete suffers😢.
Then, i walked into the balcone of ArtosMall. I realized that my motorcycle was end of fuel and I forgot to bring some money. How poor I was😢. I couldn't walk to the Gas Station because it was too far. I couldn't get back home because it was also too far. Then i decided to send a text message to my elder sister so she could picked the fuel up to me. After for about 10 minutes she came and brought 2litres of fuel and raincoat for me. Even i was already got wet -,,-. But I was happy and thanked at that time, finally there was an angel could help me 😢. But she was angry to me because i didn't check everything before i left. Then she came back home and before it she gave me 20thousands rupiahs. What a kind angel😂.
Finally, i could continue my journey to Radio Station. But i didn't realize that timed showed 4.20pm. I was too late to on air 😢. But that was okay I thought. I could arrived with my wet clothes and worked. I went home at 9pm with my dry clothes (it dried by itself because the air conditioner). In the morning, my manager got angry to me, but I apologized and explained all and she could understand. Whoaaa what a terrible experience of mine.
- Thankyou😘😘
Again you did not pay attention to the use of capital letter
ReplyDeletean optimistic feelings --> optimistic feeling
my stuffs --> my stuff
lastweek --> last week
When i --> capital problem
suddenly i felt --> capital problem
a huge heavy rain --> is the word 'rain' countable? no, it is not
My suffer not only ended at that point. --> it seems that you use the sense in Bahasa Indonesia
Suddenly, my motorcycle was off --> another sentence with Indonesian sense
I tried to pushed --> I tried to push
staring strange at me --> staring at me strangely
Noone helped me. --> None helped me
You do have problems with capital letters
"I decided to walk and take my motorcycle beside me. Noone helped me. I did it all by myself. I felt like i had been taking a shower in the road before i went work. My suffer continued, i was walking along the road when there was a car moved in high speed and made a high-jumped of water to me. Whoaaaa what a complete suffers"
Another capital problem
"Then, i walked into the balcone of ArtosMall. I realized that my motorcycle was end of fuel and I forgot to bring some money. How poor I was😢. I couldn't walk to the Gas Station because it was too far. I couldn't get back home because it was also too far. Then i decided to send a text message to my elder sister so she could picked the fuel up to me. After for about 10 minutes she came and brought 2litres of fuel and raincoat for me. Even i was already got wet -,,-. But I was happy and thanked at that time, finally there was an angel could help me 😢. But she was angry to me because i didn't check everything before i left. Then she came back home and before it she gave me 20thousands rupiahs. What a kind angel😂."
I realized that my motorcycle was end of fuel--> Sense in bahasa, again.
Try to pay attention to small things, as well.
I like your story, interesting enough. From one paragraph to the next paragraph, the flow of them is good.
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